It can be tricky knowing how to deal with difficult people, while at the same time honoring God as you do it. So, what does the Bible say about dealing with difficult people? Let’s take a look at some Biblical guidelines, as well as some actionable tips to help you deal with difficult people in your life.
What The Bible Says About Dealing With Difficult People
Be Firm and Loving with Difficult People
When dealing with difficult people in a way that honors Jesus, it’s important to be firm and loving. You don’t want to let people walk all over you, but you can express your boundaries lovingly and firmly.
Jesus wasn’t afraid to tell the Pharisees when they were wrong, but he didn’t scream at them or lose his temper. Keep this in mind as you deal with difficult people in your life.
Forgive, But Also Learn From Your Experience With Them
One key thing for dealing with difficult people is to be able to forgive them–especially as a Christian. Even if they (probably!)don’t deserve your forgiveness.
Do as Jesus said, and forgive them 70 X 7. And then, once you have forgiven them, reflect on the situation you have found yourself in with them.
How can you learn from it? What can you do differently next time?
Don’t Give The Enemy Any Space
The enemy loves to steal, kill, and destroy. (John 10:10) He wants nothing more than for you to be in discord with this difficult person in your life. If he can keep you stressed out and discouraged, then that gives him more space to do his work. Do not allow this!
Don’t let the enemy steal your joy or your peace over whatever situation you and this person have found yourself in.
Search the Bible for Answers
The Bible is your instruction manual for life. So it is important to ask the question, “What does the bible say about dealing with difficult people?”
Every time you read it God’s Word, it comes to life. Sometimes when I am facing a tricky situation with someone or something, I will open up my Bible, pray, and ask God to give me wisdom.
Open up the Bible anywhere, but you could try the New Testament when dealing with difficult people. Read and allow your heart and mind to be open to what the Bible teaches. You might be surprised!
Here are some Bible Verses for Dealing with Difficult People.
Live at peace with one another
As far as your responsibility goes, live at peace with everyone. Romans 12:18
Don’t allow any root of bitterness.
Make sure that everyone has kindness from God so that bitterness doesn’t take root and grow up to cause trouble that corrupts many of you. Hebrews 12:15
Forgive one another as I have forgiven you
Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, and forgiving one another, just as God has forgiven you because you belong to Christ. Ephesians 4:32
Follow the Biblical Guideline If They are A Member of Your Church
This will only work if the difficult person is a fellow Christian as well as a member of your local church body. But the good news is that the Bible gives us specific details on dealing with people when they sin against you.
Let’s take a look!
“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses. If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.
Matthew 18: 15-19
Allow Time to Help Heal Your Wounds
It’s been said that time heals all wounds. While this isn’t exactly found in the Bible, I have found it to be true in life.
Take some time to heal from the hurt or anger the difficult person has caused you. You will slowly see that time does help heal all wounds.
Separate Yourself From The Difficult Person
If you can, try and separate yourself from the difficult person. If they are a coworker, try to avoid them if possible. For example, if you have your lunch break at the same time don’t sit in the breakroom with them.
Recognize That There Will Always Be Difficult People In Your Life
The truth is, you can’t always avoid the difficult people in your life. You will always have difficult people in your circle. The key is to learn how to coexist in a way with them that does not rob you of your joy.
Give yourself the space to realize that, while not exactly fun–being around difficult people is inevitable…so embrace it.
All of us were made as unique individuals. Some personality types do not mix, and that’s okay!
Not every person is going to be your cup of tea. Let them live their life and respond to things how they choose. After an interaction with them, give yourself time to be frustrated or angry—but then quickly let it go and move on with the rest of your day.
Don’t give them the power to ruin your day or your mood.
God Allows Different Types of People in Your Life
In the story of Hannah and Peninnah, God allowed Peninnah to be in Hannah’s life. Even though all Peninnah did was pester the living daylights out of Hannah.
Maybe this difficult person in your life reminds you of Hannah and Peninnah.
What can you learn from them? How can this relationship make you grow as a person and, better yet—grow in your relationship with God?
Prayerfully ask God to show you what He can teach you and grow in you from this person being in your life.
Learn more about Hannah’s story!
Pray For The Difficult People In Your Life
It’s very hard to be frustrated at someone when you have spent time in prayer for them. Pray for this difficult person in your life! Pray that God would soften your heart towards them and that God would heal any wounds they might have that are making them difficult to be around in the first place. Pray for God’s greatest blessings on them!
All in all, it’s important to know what the Bible says about dealing with difficult people so that you can maintain your witness and honor God. You can use your relationship with this person to help stretch and mold you and your relationship with God.
I know it’s not easy, and sometimes it can be downright frustrating. Remember these tips, stay prayerful, and you can deal with difficult people in a way that honors God and yourself!
Leah